having a friendship with me is like nurturing a tiny baby seed
you have to be patient and give it lots of water and not get upset if it doesn’t grow right away because it takes a while…..
and then it sprouts and you can tell hey because i talk a little more and maybe start conversations
and then you water it more
and then suddenly it blooms and you realize it’s A WEED YOU DON’T WANT THIS IN YOUR GARDEN BUT IT’S TOO LATE IT NEVER STOPS IT NEVER SHUTS UP
The guy Sheldon accidentally propositions is actually his IRL boyfriend. I could barely contain my glee.
thATS JUST SO CUTE
a good response to the question “how old are you?” is something along the lines of “dunno i stopped counting after the first few centuries”
and it needs to be said seriously without smiling or humor or as casually as possible and followed by “so anyway” and a subject change as if it’s completely normal
do action movies know they can have more than one female character
Someone should make an action movie with all girls except for one guy and have no explanation or mention of it in the movie and then pay all of the actors to act surprised like they’d never noticed when they get the inevitable storm of questions.
This one male must have a shower scene, be saved by the protagonist at least once, and fall in love with a lead female.
"If a woman has [the right to abortion], why shouldn’t a man be free to use his superior strength to force himself on a woman? At least the rapist’s pursuit of sexual freedom doesn’t result in anyone’s death."
-Something Maine lawmaker Lawrence Lockman actually said
i think my brain melted from all this stupidity
some people are just so stupid they’re dangerous
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK
Sir, do you know why we pulled you over?
the dude who kicked in the windshield, also backflipped off the hood of the car. you know he’s waited his entire career to bust out those moves.
I AM THE NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT
Grayson, we know you work as a police officer for a day job, but this is not subtle. Not at all.